Village Council Member: "We've carried out extensive surveys among the public and we found that the job title executioner has negative connotations."
Sir John Woodstock: "And the options to replace it include a bladed utensil wielder ..."
Village Council Member: "Yes."
Sir John Woodstock: "... a life change practitioner, and a heaven entrance facilitator ..."
Village Council Member: "You see? It already sounds more acceptable."
Sir John Woodstock: "Yes, I'm tempted to say this whole subject is an absolute load of external reproductive receptacles."
Also, the opening bars of "Smoke on the Water" make a fabulous Medieval chant (kinda wish they would record the entire song that way ... I'd buy it)